For whatever reason you decided you want to work from home, most people are under the guise that working from home is somehow relieving. People are under this common misconception that working from home can make life simple, easy, and carefree.
Well, I have been working from home for the past 3 years. My reasons for doing so are probably similar to many others. I was sick of crappy jobs and being treated with disrespect. I believed I was somehow special and that if I started any sort of business it would blow up and I would be making millions in no time.
Oh, and it also didn't help that when I was 18 years old I did a “dine-and-dash” in Arizona because I had no food. Since the moment I did that I have not been able to get a professional job at all.
Yes, I am a very skilled person with a lot of experience in doing many things. But to this day not a single job that is worth my time will offer me employment. All they do is perform a background check and once they determine I have a “Theft of Controlled Property” on my record it’s by-by Mr. Criminal. I then find myself back at home, in front of my computer, where I have been for the past 3 years. Hustling… Begging for clicks and purchases. Really trying to make this work.
I want anyone who works from home, or is thinking of working from home, to know that it CAN bring a lot of freedom - if you are making money.
On the other hand, if you are not making enough money, than you become an insomniac, a bit of a recluse, and a paranoid computer nerd who drinks too much coffee, and doesn’t feel proud enough of himself to ask a girl on a date.
I sit here right now, with a second cup of coffee in my hand trying to figure out how, oh HOW can I get my traffic up! How can I make the $1,000’s of dollars I spent on my business and the years of effort really pay off? How can I feel proud of myself? Why can’t I just be “that guy” that can talk about coming from the bottom to the top in no time flat? Why can’t I blow up? Why can’t I be successful like all those people on TV and in the movies? Why can’t anything I write or anything that I try to do TRULY pay off? Why can’t I sit back and say I am so proud of what I accomplished today? Why can’t I be “that guy” who everyone looks up to? Why do I have to have so many issues and problems and idiosyncrasies? Why can’t I relax? Why, oh why, OH WHY won’t society forget my stupid misdemeanor? WHY!
I came from nothing and I made mistakes, and if I wanted to get a regular job, at this moment, I would have to go to a facility that typically caters to felons who can’t get employed! I sit here, working from home, living the life that many people say they want to live and I say right now that I am NOT HAPPY! I am sad. I am alone, and I just want a regular job where people treat me with even the tiniest iota of respect.
I don’t want to be a shadow on the internet lurking about forums and blogs, trying to figure out how I can improve my SEO, or how can deal with Google’s’ incessant search engine alterations and “stuffed animal” updates. I want to… be someone I could look up to if I didn’t know me!
Maybe I am alone in these feelings. Maybe I am crazy. Maybe I sit here truly isolated in my own waves of emotions. Maybe I am not special at all. Maybe the way I feel does not mean anything in the scheme of the world. I want to go back to the time when I was 16 and 17 and I believed that life had a purpose. I want to believe that I am somehow unique, and that I DO MATTER in this world.
I want to believe that I am a good person who does stand out to some sort of god or being out there. These are things that run through my mind as I work from home. Perhaps it is the simple fact that I stopped making as much money as I used to, and I have too much time on my hands. It could very well be that.
These things that I say are the things that can cross the mind of anyone who works from home. These are things that I feel in the wake of my own loneliness. These are the things that I feel when I am working from home…
So, if you are thinking of working from home, please remember that it is not always the cake walk it is presented to be. If you do work from home and are a blogger, or have an ecommerce website, than you know what I am talking about.
You know how I feel. I do not always feel like this but sometimes I do. Sometimes – like right now – I feel this way. Please don’t take this article the wrong way. I believe in independence. I believe in capitalism and working for yourself. I believe in being strong and finding ways to make money in this world that do not conform to the ways that society has laid out. I have been doing it for years.
I am 24 now and if I sit back and I look at the things I have, and compare myself to others, I can honestly say I have accomplished something. In fact, I think as I write this article I am starting to feel just a little bit better.
I hope this blog post was not useless to anyone reading it. It really has been more an emotional purge than anything else. I really am starting to feel better now. For all the people who want to work from home just remember that it can test your will-power and ability to truly try and succeed when times are rough. For people who do work from home - keep on trying to succeed.
You are a good person and I know it can be lonely sometimes but you have to keep trying to succeed. You are special. You are unique and just because nobody sees you do the things that you do does not mean that you’re any less important than people who physically interact with people on a daily basis.
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