Fear deters me from contacting him; afraid of the pain that comes from within. Fear of the words that may stab my heart, not knowing what to expect or even where to start. Missing the person I had grown to love, we used to be connected; we used to be one, blessed from above. Time goes by; so much I need to share, kept in a place of silence, why can’t I get it he just doesn’t care! Memories flash before me, I used to know him well; he’s now become a stranger, it’s impossible to tell. What is my next step, how do I touch his heart, I know he used to love me, still haven’t accepted the fact that we’re apart. Each day I tell myself to quit, move on, leave it alone; how do I forget years of togetherness; I Must now learn to do things on my own. I fight the strong energy that creeps into my veins, I want so desperately to hold him, beg him to see that we should start again. It’s all been an illusion, a recurring dream every night, he walked away and left me, it’s time to give up this fight. Focus on things that matter, get serious with my life, all I knew for ten years, was how to be someone’s wife. Reminders all around me, the things we touched together; my fabric has been changed; our magic is gone forever. My awareness has been heightened, fear grips me at my core, I only want to contact him, to tell him more and more. I’ve lost the love of my life, I will eventually let go; acceptance is the key, to prepare me for the unknown.
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